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Correspondence from Aleister Crowley to Jane Wolfe
c/o G. Aumont [Gerard Aumont] 16 Av. de Carthage, Tunis.
March 10, 1925 e.v.
Cara Soror,
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
Feeling myself in need of humiliation, I deliberately set myself to wade into the morass of nauseating slush produced by the putrid faecality of your mind.
You have done everything I have told you not to do on any account, and you have done nothing that I told you. All this preoccupation with parts of the body is detestable. The messing up with the 'bodies' imagined by flatulent Theosophists is almost worse. I have never read anything so loathsomely messy.
The whole thing reminds me in quality of the ravings of the woman in "The Maniac"; but of course she was a very amateur beginner. Why you should imagine that stuff of this sort would interest me in any way is beyond me. It has nothing whatever to do with any of my work. The only suggestion I can make is that you have lost your unity, and that a particularly unpleasant kind of demon takes charge at times. I take this comparatively favaourable view, because you are so far not completely hallucinated. But I warn you very seriously that if you go on in this way you will lose all touch with reality. It might even be best for you to go into a lunatic asylum at once while there is a reasonable chance of cure. You had at least better go to Sister Gibbons and attend to your health and you have got absolutely to stop any occult work whatever and speculations about your front spine. When you have a pain, get a Doctor to put you right. Every time you stub your toe you think it is a message from the Masters. And I simply decline to be mixed up in anything of the sort.
Love is the law, love under will,
Yours fraternally,
T.M.O. 666
[handwritten by Jane Wolfe on letter] March 23 1925
Above first of March I felt it was improper to continue this work, but did so for several reasons:—
1. I was bored with my life, living in a furnished room with my effects locked up elsewhere.
2. At times the pleasurable sensation appealed to me and I and I waded in deeper and deeper to discover just where lay this "Selfishness"; and the work was opening up and showing to me parts of myself with which I was unacquainted.
3. Past work has diminished much rigidity in many parts of my body.
I consider that a just part of this work, [which has been going on at [illegible] since August, 1922 (It really started, however, at the time of my G.[reat] M.[agical] R.[etirement]. in Cefalu)] [illegible] part of the work necessary for the preparation of this instrument—that within certain [illegible] and degrees it was altogether proper. But I doubt not I made many blunders, sometimes took advantage of a desire for Sensation, continued the work when I should have stopped it; and all wrong since May 1924.
But that is just the point: One can act as though we believed, using instructions as a sinking formula, but—believing in quite another matter.
Estai
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