|
Correspondence from André Pigné to Aleister Crowley
20 College Crescent N.W.3.
2 Apr 36
Dear Mr. Crowley.
Please read carefully this letter. Every time we had an interview, I have tried to have a frank explanation with you, but both my natural timidity and the way our conversation turned, made it impossible for me to explain fully what is on my mind. First, I have been here 1 month and 2 weeks and there is not the slightest improvement. I am not going to spend any more money on a treatment that has no effect on me.
With regard to the 'money' question, I have none. My father being in ill health is not able to earn as before. Consequently I could not afford to give you 2 gns [guineas] a week. I have been spending so much since I came, that I find myself in jeopardy now financially. Also, let us face facts, I have not the courage to study. I shall never have to will to study hard enough to become good at magick. In this case, why should I start? Moreover I have found during the last year and even now that my interest in occultism is gradually diminishing, whatever the reason may be. Therefore I haven't first the courage and secondly the desire. You may think me foolish, but that is what is on my mind.
Write me, if you care, and advise me; I am afraid an interview will not make me change my mind. My timidity may prevent me to speak verbally the above mentioned statements and make it awkward for me, but my mind is made up. I shall not study, I have not the courage—I could have told you all this, I prefer to write it.
Meanwhile I am, sincerely yours.
A. Pigné
|