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Correspondence from Karl Germer to Jane Wolfe
K.J. GERMER 133 West 71st Street New York, N. Y.
January 25, 1943
Dear Jane,
I had the copy of your letter to A.C. of Jan. 20th which you sent me. I am glad you had cabled him, so that he is fully informed. I am having difficulties with the Censor out here; for some reason or other they question me every time I get a cable or send a cable to London (A.C. or somebody else, my solicitors) not only about every matter or person that is mentioned, but also their addresses, activities etc., the OTO, the Agape Lodge, but also about my business, the office address, how I run it and all the rest. If I get a cable I can be sure to be called up by the censor the next day. So I consider it wise to cable as little as possible.
You may remember that So-and-so Greene [Graham] [Mildred Burlingame] had ordered 9 vols. of the Equ[inox] for $35.00, on which she gave $10.00 as a deposit. I don't think I can hold this any longer, and the deposit would have to go by default unless she pays up at once as she had promised. Have you any means of contacting her or do you know her address? Is there any body else in the Lodge who would care to take these 9 vols. for the balance due, i.e. $25.00?
Your references to me in your letter to AC were interesting, I refer to the remarks by 132 [Wilfred T. Smith] and Jack [Jack Parsons]. If I can speak frankly to you, I would say that 132 acted like a little boy in his childish hatred, his vile remarks about everybody else in California, about A.C. himself, in many of his letters to me, which showed me too clearly over a year ago where he stood magically and spiritually. I forced myself to be very patient, used diplomacy where it was indicated, but did not refrain from being outspoken on some occasions. Jack, when visiting here, was treated by Cora [Cora Germer] myself in the most hospitable way. He did not open up in the slightest, and kept shut up like a clam, but snooped the atmosphere like a detective who has to report to a superior. Yet I did my utmost, met him enthusiastically, as some of my earlier letters to him showed. My antennae sensed the root of the trouble, and made some unspoken remarks to him. Alas! He was and still is too young, immature, and unfree for the position I then hoped for him.
He went back, reported to 132 what he had seen and heard, and now, I feel acutely from several signs, will finally fall under the dreadful spell to which he yielded.
Do understand: I feel very intensely for yourself and the grave decision you had to take, and that you took it, that you affirmed your attachment once again to the OTO itself, its heads and what it stands for and shook yourself loose from the shadows that had hung over you. I feel intensely the difficult situation you are in which may torture you in its daily connections. Do remain firm; you have weathered storms in London in 1923 (was it?) and elsewhere that were worse. You will get help.
Why, for goodness' sake can't you find the way to Max [Max Schneider] and open up in a talk between brother and sister? It seems to me you have some distorted vision of Max's soul. I know him very well; I know that he had to go through hard times and ordeals these last 12 years. But everything, every act of his during these last one or almost two years proves that he has come through. It was Max's heroic efforts that were the main help to me. I wish Agape Lodge had shown similar devotion to the Work.
Our Order judges by inherent qualities. The feather of Maat must be unstirred by even the slightest breath of falsehood. No fake, no powderpuff make-up can fool the Supreme Heads. I have a suspicion that you yourself have permitted yourself to lose sight of this when judging others. We want much: utter devotion, perfect purity of soul and aspiration, and all the rest on top of that. The tests are severe and unfailing. If anybody has the littlest impurity left, the best is to push him into the water if he doesn't want to go wash himself. And for God's sake let everybody leave aside the thought as though anybody acted for personal ambition, to get somebody's else's position, to take something away or what not. We need hundreds of people. But none that isn't tested to the marrow of his bones.
With fraternal love,
Karl
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