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Correspondence from Grady McMurtry to Karl Germer
1803rd Ord S&M Co (Avn) 68th Service Group APO 182, Unit #1, % Postmaster Los Angeles, California
September 4, 1943
Care Frater:
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
Your suggestion in regards to my September allotment has been followed, the M.O. [Money Order]. being mailed to the Secretary of the Pasadena Lodge [Agape Lodge]. No word has been received from Jack [Jack Parsons] and, at this late date, none is expected.
That poesy discription [sic] of some accidents during manuvers [sic] was just a poet’s nature getting the better of his judgement [sic]. I still think that it was a damn shame that those men were killed in avoidable accidents without ever having so much as having fired a shot at the enemy. If such is used as a basis for declaring me “softie” then I bow to the court’s decision. I appreciate what you have to say about the “machinery of the Universe”, this death and life, day and night, two sections of an oscillating cure plotted on a multi-dimensional graph, but I find it hard to balance this fatalistic “it doesn’t make any difference what you do” attitude with what I have read of the Master’s teachings. Sure, I know that when it comes time for me to blow I’ll take a powder but I also know that I have at any moment the privilege of blowing my brains out and effecting the same end. Every movement may be considered as a communion with Adonai—nevertheless if you walk off a cliff you have blasphemed against your karma—as the Master points out. It is up to me to do every thing possible to advance myself along the road in this life so that, should my death be premature, I will be that much closer to my goal. That, to me, means more than just sitting around and letting my arteries ossify. I have no intention of staying of staying in the lyric stage, of beingwide [sic] eyed and breathless about every new discovery, but when I leave that stage will be dictated, I am sure, by my own progress.
The “House of God” error, the German fiasco, the “manuver accident” prosy (for which accept my apologies for your inconvenience), and other manifestations of loose thinking may all be lumped under the gneral [sic] title of “Stupe”. You see I have an unfortunate habit of falling on the neck of any person whose ideas are even remotely similar to my own with loud shouts of glee and rejoicings. As a result I let my hair down, allow my enthusiasm to get the better of me, and in general behave like a damn fool. Most embarrassing. I don’t think you need bother yourself about a recurrence of such actions as I am almost cured.
Paradox: You speak of discipline. The Master asserts that he is “shiftless and irresponsible”. This would seem strange. I presume that you are speaking of the self control necessary to bring the mind and body into focus while he is speaking of the necessity of following one’s true will regardless of the temporal world. Am I correct or am I again sadly in error?
I have read the first two volumes of A.C.’s “Spirit of Soltitude” but have been unable to secure the other (or others). Could you help me out in this respect?
Love is the Law, Love under Will!
Fraternally in the Bonds of the Order
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