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Correspondence from Jane Wolfe to Aleister Crowley
[26 November 1943]
As I sit here writing I find myself still annoyed by 1003 [1003 S. Orange Grove Avenue]. Would you help me here? What am I disturbed about? I wrote you that silly little note in August, perhaps impertinently saying, "Love and confidence." I wanted you to know I agreed with your decision that Smith [Wilfred Talbot Smith] had to get out, but why could I not write at all, all summer? Of course I have faced "Nothing but an empty bluff", and similar derogatory thoughts about Jane, but that has nothing to do with this· annoyance lodged somewhere within me. I would understand this thorn.
I questioned myself as to whether you were the source, but could not find a connection: 1003 was all wrong, 1746 [N. Winona Boulevard] before that was wrong also. Was I annoyed about Jack [Jack Parsons]? In some respects, yes. but not because of his position. It may be Smith himself, but why! My own shortcomings and failures should sent me in sack-cloth and ashes that he resigned rather than have Karl [Karl Germer] and Max [Max Schneider] on The Committee.
I typed Jack's last letter to you. It saddened me, and horrified me. But I thought it well you should know how he felt: so I made but one comment when he asked my opinion, and the offending sentence was removed. Jack reads "Weird Stories", etc.·, "Astounding Scientific" and others of like ilk. He wants to do Space work with planes after the war. He also has a number of books on witchcraft. His potential is great. When the ego is in abeyance his understanding is rare. His lack of stability ruins much. But I am quite sure he has a deep regard for you and the Order.
When I left, Wilfred had already started disposing of everything saleable, as well as getting rid of accumulations of all sorts—he felt it was his job to do this—preparatory to turning back the property to the owner; Choronzon explains his mind, no doubt. For some years I noticed that he says things which sound O so serious: confronted later with the statements he is certain he never said them. Others noticed this trait in him. He talked, talked, whenever he obtained a listener, and himself said when he heard of Roy's [Roy Leffingwell] getting the ranch: "He goes out and gets a ranch: I talk!" As far back as 1940 he said: "Well, Jane: I think I am through."
Sarah N. [Sara Northrup], Jack's pal, stepped across the threshold of womanhood at the age of 10: vital experiences began at 12. She graduated from University of Cal. at L.A. at 17. Started "ghost writing" at 16, this taking the form of theses, etc., for students. She wrote 2 very interesting papers on LIBER AL for our Class nights, is mentally easy on the platform, but her 5'9" make her a bit uncomfortable, while her youth embarrasses her.
Last summer Jack and I bedeviled her into assuming the responsibility of her pen, and this fall she joined 2 "Writing and Composition" courses, one at U.C.L.A. and the other at Pasadena. She needs this yoke; otherwise she would work spasmodically, then quit altogether. Both she and Jack are lazy; love poetry, read it by the hour to each other; and are also fond of good music. Sarah is a clever girl, 19 years of age. She unhesitatingly goes after what she wants, could be a great and gracious woman in firmer hands. Jack gives her sound advice, but stands apart from it; she therefore promptly sloughs it off, and goes on her way singing. Funnily enough, her singing was the first thing my ears missed after coming to Hollywood.
Both are proud and self-willed, but will eat out of one's hand if adroitly handled. I find both of them quite likeable. I mean, if told frankly they are this or that, contrarily to their own ideas of themselves, they hit the ceiling and instantly strike out and back. A day or two later Jack will come and say, "I guess they are tight, I can see wherein Betty [Sara Northrup] is not good for me"; in that she has the same weaknesses that he has, he once told me. But so far he has been unable to find himself another companion, some are afraid of him, or his imagination is not touched.
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