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Correspondence from Aleister Crowley to John Symonds
8 Aug 46
Dear John Symonds
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
I am at last able to answer yours of the 31st ultimo. The obstacles have been insuperable till now. In the first place, I have been suffering from frustration to the greatest degree. I cannot get any cartridge paper to print that beastly book on, and I cannot get any buckram.
I am especially annoyed because when I originally gave these people the contract [to print Olla], they assured me there was no difficulty, but since then conditions have suddenly become more stringent again. Why they couldn't have had the sense to buy the stuff when it was easy to do so I cannot imagine. Their excuse is that it was my fault, because I did not then know how many copies I should want printed on account of the Augustus John portrait.
In the second place, the weather here has been most depressing and stifling. I have found it quite impossible to pull myself together—as much together to take any exercise.
There is another difficulty—this new house next door is a most frightful business; they only made one mistake in planning it, and that is; they have kept it above ground! Believe it or not, they have put in beds by the dozen—2 storeys as in the underground as in the blitz—there is no accommodation whatever either for washing or any other human convenience. Both the projectors being on the Town Council I suppose they can get away with it, but if I had anything to do with sanitary arrangements of this town, I would not waste ten minutes before prosecuting. It is the most foul contrivance that I have ever seen.
This of course is all an argument on your side. I shall certainly be driven out within a comparatively few days now. But what I am about to do I have no idea. I have made a number of enquiries about accommodation in London, or near it, and I gather there is simply no hope of anything, and even if I could get an adequate flat, I gather that it would be extremely difficult to get the only kind of food I can eat.
Of course, my only reason for giving up my flat in Jermyn Street [93 Jermyn St] was that Miss Manning [Crowley's landlord] said she could no longer guarantee service.
The one bright spot is that there is no particular reason for anxiety about finances, but it is no good saying that one is willing to pay ten or twelve pounds a week, if you cannot get reasonable accommodation at double that amount.
You see the dilemma: that is why I think that my original plan of an Abbey of Thelema is the only possible one. If we had say from 12 to 30 people more or less devoted to the work, which is not an impossible estimate, and if one or two of those people with leisure could go around and look for an adequate headquarters, it would be possible to find something in fairly short order.
I do not know what to say to you about your personal offer. It is the most magnificent that I have ever heard of, but it seems to me despite that, that it does not quite dovetail with the needs of the case.
Our first requirement is space, while on the other hand what you offer is in several respects much more than we need as far as I can see. Two afternoons a week would be quite sufficient for all the secretarial work that is wanted.
What actually happens and has been happening for the last few years is that I get all sorts of work done, and brought up to a certain state, and then is chokes itself up; until we have some sort of filing system established, and an adequately furnished library, all we can do is to keep on accumulating masses of rubbish in which is inextricably entwined all sorts of valuable stuff.
Let me give you a simple example: I have at last driven myself to write the last two Letters of "Magick Without Tears"—I have got them typed, and I have put the top copies in the special folder, but what am I going to do with the other two? I am not sure how many Letters I sent to you. I am pretty sure that some are packed away in another folder, but then there should have been a couple more copies sent to America.
What is wanted with regard to this particular book, now that its copy is complete, is to have the top copy in complete form handed to you for editing, cataloguing, indexing and putting thro' the press.
Observe that my mind through preoccupation with creative work tends to run away from all other kinds of work. When I have got my top copy all in order, I have got so sick of the whole book that the other copies become a jumble. I have gone thro' endless agony correcting the top copy for literals, and I feel that it is too much to expect to ask me to correct the other copies, and to put them away in order in their proper files, and so on and son on.
You may think that this is very weak of me, and so it is, I dare say, but my resentment is after all fairly natural. The truth is that I want encouragement, and that daily.
What price do you think I should ask [for Olla]? It is important to know, because that will have to go on the title page. Please let me know as soon as you can in case we find ourselves able to get the paper and the buckram.
If necessary I could come to London after you have seen Frederic Mellinger, which I hope will be next week, and then make a three-some of it.
Love is the law, love under will.
Yours.
A.C.
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