Correspondence from Phyllis Seckler to Marcelo Motta

 

 

 

November 20, 1962

 

 

Dear Marcello,

 

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

 

Thank you for your letter of the 7th of November, which informed Sascha [Sascha Germer] and myself of your present position and also gave such good advice.

     

I am afraid I must explain my attitude on some matters but I hope you will understand I seek to leave you with your own—since in Thelema one must also let the other person accomplish his own will. But I also feel that a little of the light of common sense may alleviate a situation, so I sometimes break loose and express it.

     

First, I feel it is a mistake to write to me instead of Sascha, especially when you have so much information and instruction for her. This caused me an extra trip as I felt she should have your letter as soon as possible after I had received it, since it concerned her so closely. It is very foolish of you to think mail is monitored, which I assure you it is not here in America. Further, what you had to say could have been read by any idiot with no harm to either of the three of us.

     

Because the letter was addressed to me I naturally opened it and read it, and allowed my family to see it too [ . . . ]. However, since the letter was opened and was handed to Sascha in that form the next day after I received it, she demanded to know to whom I had shown it. This was after I had waited for her to read it. Then she intimated in a suspicious manner that I had shown it to some enemy of hers and of Karl [Karl Germer]. I couldn't imagine what she had in mind, nor to whom I might show such a letter. I was momentarily hurt to think that she should entertain such suspicions of me. I went away that day in great inquietude of mind and have sought the Angelic guidance all this week whenever the matter was brought into my memory again. Finally, tonight the answer came, and I now write this letter to you and will show the copy of it to Sascha.

     

I want you both to understand fully my approach to this matter of "attacks." My extreme conviction is that they cannot occur when one obeys the Angel. Therefore, for me, they don't exist. I quote Liber AL, I, 46 and 47: "Dost thou fail? Art thou sorry? Is fear in thine heart? Where I am these are not." I am forever astonished that Thelemites refuse to be strong as AL enjoins. And I am also convinced that lack of strength occurs because Angelic guidance is far off or not heard, or tuned away from. On this matter of same is to consult the Angel immediately.

     

I am also well aware that I am treading on thin ice, for Karl himself explained to me at great length the manner in which he was "attacked" by the F.B.I. and various other inimical forces. His convictions on this point served to keep me from visiting his home more often than I did.

     

I'll explain further. Jane [Jane Wolfe] once confronted him with the fact that he was "neurotic" on this matter and he admitted it was true. She later told me about it. Then when I met Karl and heard his long stories about "attacks" I realized that part of it was true and part probably manufactured. He managed to torture himself quite considerably while brooding over this matter. I always felt sorry for him, but said very little about it to him, for he loved his way of thinking so greatly that he became enraged if anyone opposed him by a little common sense. This is always true of clinical cases of such neuroses. The patient himself must see for himself how he hurts himself needlessly, and no outsider can do this for him. I am no psychiatrist and so did not meddle.

     

However, from my own experiences in the spiritual realms I am just as convinced that life is JOY and that attacks do not exist when one is close to the Angelic voice and guidance. Liber AL helps to strengthen this conviction. Sp speak to me no longer of "attacks." But I wish to leave you with your own point of view—if you enjoy them, who am I to say they don't exist for you? At least in your own imagination?

     

I advise a further knowledge of Liber AL—Cap. I, verses 31, 32, 58, 61, and Cap. II, verses 9, 17, 18, 20, 21, and so on ad infinitum.

     

I like your attitude very well about death. You are right, Karl does not die, he lives, and in a better form and probably having shed his neuroses. May all the Gods help this magnificent star on his journey through the unseen realms. But that is badly put—for each of us is a God in his own right. Some more so, some less, and Karl fundamentally is a great one, but wore a veil of sorrow on earth. For why, I do not know.

     

As for Schlag—that too is silly. I met him once, sat very close to him for a full day in a car trip to San Francisco from L.A. I also routed him in argument. I have not seen him since. I sensed how dangerous he was immediately but he was also fool enough to give me the particulars of his birth and hour. He is stupid besides. I gave him no such information about myself nor about Thelema. How can you go on so about which Abramelin demon he is possessed by? Do you have an acquaintance with the demons yourself? Or are you making up a good science fiction story—the kind that will possess your own mind and finally eat it away in a neuroses (or worse) of your own?

     

Sascha is reading old letters at the present and does not seem inclined to pack away precious manuscripts and put them in a safe place along with everything else. As of last Sunday she has not yet found the Will left by Karl. I do not feel like interfering with these goings on as she has already leveled a suspicion at me. However, I say this boldly and fearlessly, I can no longer be of any assistance if I am going to be suspected. This frame of mind I am unable to work with for it too well ties my powers in knots. I have the ability to correct and collate manuscripts, to write to publishers, to file, sort and put in order and to know exactly where I have put things. Karl himself recognized these abilities and remarked on one occasion that I had Executive powers. This is true. I could copy manuscripts you request—and as you say—a little at a time since I spend a full day teaching and run a house-hold besides, and also owe a duty to my artistic side. But Thelema and A.C.'s manuscripts hold such a fascination for me that I would gladly copy them one by one—starting with the most important, of course.

     

Now I have offered my services on this point. Since you are probably the heir to the library from what Sascha says, since she witnessed the will, and since she is the executor, I can do nothing without either of you asking me to do so. And I can do nothing if I am not trusted.

     

Sascha lives 165 miles from me and there is much to do to settle this estate. I am only too glad to help her since I thought of Karl so highly on spiritual planes and since I feel Thelema in every last pore of my body and every last cell.

     

Let me fill you in on Sascha's situation. She is 5 miles from any store and relies only on the kindness of neighbors for her mail and for occasional trips to the store for food, since she does not drive. She is all alone, but protected by 3 dogs who make quite something of the approach of strangers. She lives in wild country which spews forth an occasional coyote or wild animal of the cat family. There is also much cattle in the neighborhood. She would really like to be near a store, and in more civilized surroundings, and near a doctor, and near a bus line. But the property is paid for, I understand, and so she does not have to pay rent. Her monthly payments on social security are only enough for food. That is the present situation.

     

The door to the library has a lock and key, and so do the file cases, but Sascha is convinced "they" also possess a key. I say no more.

     

It is also my opinion that A.C.'s literary remains are guarded by a powerful spirit, as I felt one evening when I was staying overnight.

     

Now, as to Thelemites in California. That is a long story which I really ought to write down some day. A.C. had to destroy Agape Lodge for they couldn't follow the simplest command in The Book of the Law—that which appears at the beginning of this letter. They further interpreted every passage about love to mean Sex. They were the lunatic fringe that you see around every occult manifestation and lots else on earth besides. Unfortunately, one or two of them were let in on certain IX°th degree secrets and so have become dangerous since. One of these is Dr. Montenegro [Gabriel Montenegro], whom please avoid if you meet—or no, maybe not avoid, but take precautions as the Angel might advise. The rest are foolish at the least, not much else. I advised Sascha not to let these persons in on Karl's death until the manuscripts were safely put someplace else. She may chose not to follow this advice; I don't know. I shall not press the point but felt strongly about it myself and counted it as coming from Above. I think there is protection in the magickal realms, but perhaps not much on the physical side. While Karl lived he was the best protection possible. The job ahead can probably only be accomplished by someone so strong as he—or maybe stronger.

 

Love is the law, love under will.

 

Fraternally,

 

276—Phyllis

 

 

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