Frank Bennett Diary Entry

Thursday, 22 September 1921

Thursday. Got up much better. Washed, shaved—felt much better, in fact wanted to go to tent, but A.C. said not to be in a hurry. So had a walk in the morning, came to dinner in the Umbilicus for the first time in five days. After dinner had another walk, and sat under one of the great ugly olive trees, and began to think about the condition that led me to fall sick. I went back to the Friday night before, when A.C. proposed to read the Invocation to Venus, when I asked him to postpone it to some other time, as I felt I could not stand another shock just then. Now during the day I had worked very hard on 'Liber Samekh,' and felt on the point of something—I do not know what.

But I know that my subconscious mind had partly worked out another story, of which I cannot remember anything now, except a few incidents. But I could not work it out now. I think that during the time of slackness while sick, I have been able to find out the real state of things. I cannot describe them properly, but I know the physical mind has been fighting the subconscious. And I think I can distinguish between them now, and how to throw the physical mind back, as it were, to let the subconscious mind work its will, through the physical brain.^[1]

1—Crowley's comment: 'If you can do this, all right; the rest will come by itself in its own good time.'

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