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Aleister Crowley Diary Entry Tuesday, 29 May 1923
Die Mars
12.37 a.m. Note to work out the argument for CCXX: ‘how should I, an Intelligence of praeterhuman nature, prove my existence and indicate my Nature?’ It will be seen that the method actually adopted is the only one which is absolutely watertight.
1.25 a.m. My subconscious makes sinister jokes! I was thinking of Frater AUD [Raoul Loveday]—whose death still saddens me greatly—of an incident in which I had proposed that he should take up epistemology. l couldn’t think of the word—and got Eschatology!! I began to add words up and lo! epistēmologia = 333 !!! The science of sciences—Choronzon!!! Be thou restriction thereunto in the name of Babalon! Note episteme = 157 plus 8 = 165.
1.45 a.m. [dictated to Alostrael (Leah Hirsig)]. In interviews, my business is to crossexamine the client. It is to help him to find his True Will. (Note the Devil as the accuser of the Brethren.) Client comes to Alostrael and tells her what he wants. If Beast hasn’t shaken him, it is good evidence that it is his True Will. It must be understood that a False Will won’t come off.
2.40. I have been asking Ethyl [Ether] about Political Wisdom. I find that Do what thou wilt is given by NE SUTOR [sic] ULTRA CREPIDAM in a very humble but important way. I got, too, an idea of what I am fighting—and am ready to die—for. Parallel: battle of lvry (was it?) where Protestant defeat would have meant the invasion of France by a swarm of Monks, spies, inquisitionists, etc. Now I want to protect children—who should be Crowned and Conquering—from Parents, Schoolmarms, Doctors, Tax gatherers, Lawyers, Parsons, Politicians, etc. (It’s hard to say what one means on such a big scale especially as this war seems to have no precedent. Of course there must be tuition, family discipline, hygiene, and so on: but at present it is the Official (or one acting as such) who must be squelched. The more I think, the more my vision clouds over, with thoughts. I’m certainly not an anarchist, for the family is the smallest and so vilest unit of government: nor a Socialist, for the State is the largest and so the least human unit. I suppose then, that—with Ethyl as without—! want a Patriarchal-Feudal system run by initiated Kings. I think, though, that (in applying the Law of Thelema to all cases) necessity will indicate the form of government required.
I had numerous other interesting visions: e.g. How it is that the G.P. [General Practitioner] can’t be expected to extract an appendix, why big lawyers are justified in asking high prices, why they are just to operate poor patients gratis, etc, etc. I noticed that most of the vision was exercise of the imagination in the true sense and that much of the work done was to destroy childish conceptions about things. My own practice (by the way) is this imagination—and I saw how big a percentage of skill practice is—I ought therefore to be earning big fees at it, and the magical plan outlined yesterday seems to fit well with this.
Given the main facts—which I have on most subjects—I can tell why anything is as it is, how it came to be so, what will happen to it, and how to act about it. This is the meaning of giving Magical Assistance to people, I suppose, in actual practice?
I ought to be Consulting Magician to the World.
4.00. A violent wind very depressing. Note that the Universe being ‘that which one imagines’ it is only necessary to imagine it right. The trouble with Mary Eddy and Uncle [Emile] Coué is that their technique of Imagination is imperfect. And the trouble with mine has been Indifference: hence the need of my Vision of Something worth Fighting for. At the same time the indifference helps the Imagination to keep clear of the clouds of Passion.
5. P.M. I have doubted as to whether I am such a great Magician after all, even while smiling at the doubts of people who seemed to expect me to bewitch cattle. I have just discovered the complete answer to both of us. I possess the power of causing spiritual crises. This of course the only thing that ever happened. Produce your crisis in your man and the rest follows in due course. Note that I can do this in my absence. John Bull is perfectly right. Furthermore, owing to the unfamiliarity of people with the Force and even my own uncertainty as to the details of what will happen, accidents are inevitable. But as soon as it is recognized generally that this Force exists and people come to me for political or commercial success, as they now go to Xian Scientists to get rid of headaches, the confidence of the client and its reaction on me will combine to produce the happiest results. What seems to be wanted is a campaign of advertising to say that I can bring about whatever is required; and of course I need not do more than talk in the most ordinary way with the client. The miracle will happen; that is, it will happen most of the time, though sometimes nothing will occur and sometimes disaster. It will do no harm in the long run to let people know that the process is dangerous. All big forces are so, and all big enterprises involve loss of life. Do not conclude from the above that Faith would be the motive power of success, though absence of Faith naturally operates as an inhibition.
In fact, the above analysis should serve as some indication of the real function of Faith in such operations. The problem is how to go to work to exploit my Power now that I have at last discovered the conditions of using it. I am wondering whether it would be advisable to fix my energy by means of a talisman or formula.
The client should have an interview with me. He need not necessarily tell me what he wants, but if I agree to help him he then sees Alostrael and then tells her what it is. An oath is to be exacted pledging the client to secrecy as to what his object is under penalty of failing to obtain it.
Later. It is, obviously, of the most vital importance to work "without lust of result" and to make "no difference ———" otherwise we should get tied up with all sorts of complex magical rituals and faile from anxiety and doubts as to responsibility—et hoc genus omne.
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