Meredith Starr Diary Entry

Wednesday, 10 August 1910

My stay in Southsea—which I have prolonged until Aug 23—is developing into a Magical Retirement, of a kind! Adonai is getting stronger every day. I am sending out continually a silent, steady current of will towards Him—like a river slowly but surely gathering up its forces—becoming stronger and stronger as it flows—until it empties itself into the ocean.

At 9 p.m. I asked the landlady—Mrs. T.—to come to my room saying that I would try to do something for her hearing. . . . She has been almost—not quite—deaf for 27 years and has noises in her head. . . . I asked her to sit down while I—in robe—went through an abridged Ritual to Adonai. . . . I then put my hands to her ears for a short while during which there was complete silence and a great calm—produced by my Higher Self's Presence (unseen) in the room. When I removed my hands and told her I had finished, she said that the noises in her head had stopped. She also said that while I was invoking she felt as if there was something tremendously powerful and uplifting in the room—and that she had never felt so calm and at peace in her life.

I believe that her hearing will get better—mais, nons verrons.

With my mind silently focused on Adonai I went to bed at 9.30. . . . After I had been lying down for a short while several odd things occurred. First I broke into profuse perspiration—though why I do not know. Then the whole of my body grew very warm, and my spine felt as if something red hot was being poured down—or rather up—it. . . . This feeling was very pronounced—almost painful. Then the "Giant Feeling" came—as I had before had it when breathing. I seemed tremendous—like a God lying down. I felt gloriously happy in the consciousness of having vast power. . . . My spine seemed still red-hot—but I liked the feeling. All this time I never released my concentration—which has become almost habitual—on Adonai.

I rather think I am approaching a low state of Samadhi: certainly my will is gradually and ceaselessly increasing with my concentration; the latter involves practically no effort. It is like a river slowly and steadily flowing to its destination.

How long I slept I do not know; I lay awake almost the whole night. . . . gloriously happy. . . . and enfolded in a great calm.

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