|
A.M. |
|
I could not sleep last night.
It seemed to me so appalling that a woman, within
three weeks of confinement, should be sent out
alone—to—spend those three weeks alone and to go
through her ordeal alone—that A.C. could have
thought of such a thing! It seemed all the more
cruel in Shummie’s [Ninette Shumway]
case because of her temperament, which includes so
much. Perhaps, too, I was somewhat influenced by the
Yi, which said possible death.
Is it the way of the Tao? ‘Unto seventy times
seven’. Also, this matter has brought up a question
within my mind: Suppose an encounter between two,
the one with authority—at least accepted authority,
to send another to an isolated spot, saying, there
you stay without food till you do my will, this
other out of a supreme stubbornness remaining where
sent, the former meantime waiting for compliance,
the latter starving rather than give in. Could a
third step in and feed the starving before it was
too late?
This question has arisen in my
mind, presumably because I ‘butted’ into A.C.’s
plan, as I now realize; not deliberately to
interfere but because I did not follow out the
complete workings. Please heaven, with her decision
I had naught to do but, after hat on head,
instructions given and she was ready to leave for
Palermo, I said I would send her money in case A.C.
did not do so.
Seeing this in its true light,
I shall maintain silence; but from such lack of
grasping all details great occasions may arise.
However, it opened my eyes to myself, may they
remain open! |