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During night a voice, as though
my own, arguing for a “dream”—time and again—but
there was no response. Strange this should come up
again after so many months.
However, there is pressure
along the line somewhere. During my first weeks at
Cefalu I suffered agonies through the top of my
head—incessant chatter and great physical pain, that
caused hysterical spells.
Again is something upon
me—since Nov. 14, so subtle I did not at first
recognize it, cumulative in effect. Noticed closely
yesterday and now feel confirmed. But this is (it
seems) inside the centre of my body.
I could regard it as pressure
to look away from self, for stopping to regard this,
and therefore in a way feeling somewhat of it, I
cannot hold on—I feel shaken toward insanity.
Attempt silence—nothing doing. |