A.M.

Half-past three yesterday 1 capsule of grass, one hour later, 1/2 capsule. Enormous appetite at five, which I indulged with Mortadello, glass of wine, and liquer [sic]. Hit bull’s eye with Shummie [Ninette Shumway] each time I tried. Genesthai’s [C. F. Russell] witticisms missed fire with her. Returned to Abbey to get fire going for Pentagram. Sat in kitchen waiting for Turkish coffee, and three times essayed what G[enesthai], said was “rising on the planes”. This so new I noted only sensation of going, expansion, and wondering if I could remain a unit or fly into a million fragments, and could I ever again get myself small enough to enter the physical. Is it safe to try this now? I feel like experimenting.

After Pentagram stomach discharged superfluous food, as all good stomachs should do. Thank you! Felt very good.

During evening lay on couch. Shummie beside me, her head resting on my elbow the better to read. An impression of two boys, 3 or 4 and 7 or 8, dressed in rich velvets, I the older, a self-constituted buffer, shock-absorber and comforter of the younger—we virtually prisoners inside spacious walls. A feeling of isolation and loneliness.

Being the first of February, shall begin my schedule.

7:15-35

Asana, a sitting still. Feel last night somewhat.

7:35-50

Harpocrates.

Fair; broke after 10’, again in 5’; then force gone. Last 5’ better than first 10’.

P.M.

Worked on two geometric figures, one for Beast and Paris trip, one for self for next two months.

9:17-35

Asana.

Mind wandered round geometric fig, & other things forgotten.

9:35-53

Dharana, yel. sq.

Made comparisons with Dharana work heretofore. Think I have discovered a leak.

Tried Harpocrates, but failed.

Have notice how much better [C.F.] Russell does the Pentagram since departure of A.C. and Lea [Leah Hirsig]. The feeling of restraint is gone, there is force and much better reading.